Listed below are the sorts of things I work on with my clients.

Relationships: Family & Partnerships

What most people seem to need in gaining insight in their relationship struggles are more support for and awareness of what's true for them in any given relationship. Then they need to find the courage to say it. Most of us in some ways hold back too much to protect others and in other ways blame people unfairly when we haven't been clear enough about what we want. 

What's usually called for is a re-balancing of these tendencies. We need to risk our small-t truths more often and learn to stay at the table with whatever the other person's response is. As any professional negotiator has learned: being willing to hear no, can bring a lot more of what you deeply want into your life.

Addiction and Recovery

From a Gestalt perspective we turn to our addictions (our binge-watching, internet surfing, spending, drinking, drugging, eating, co-dependent relationships etc) when we can no longer tolerate reality as it is. Something happens or boredom happens and suddenly we want to run from our current experience. Whatever it is that does it for you, addiction means a substance or behaviour that brings temporary relief for intolerable reality. At best, we're taking relief from facing our challenges, at worst we're taking a step in the direction of self-destruction, when what we really need is growth. 

For anyone who struggles deeply with addiction (in truth, I think it's human nature to have them--the question is one of degrees), there is some form of discomfort and pain that they are running from. In Gestalt we know that we cannot outrun our addictions. We will only put down our harmful substances and behaviours once we find actual support where once there was only intolerable discomfort. 

Please note that the majority of my experience in this area is with disordered eating and co-dependency. In addition to my Gestalt training, I also have a great deal of experience with the 12-Step community approach to healing addiction.

Learning to be on your own Team (Self-Resourcing)

There is no substitute for liking who you are. Depression, poor self-care, pushing yourself beyond your limits, seeking affirmation from others when what you really need is your own--these are some of the core issues I find myself addressing with my clients. 

Despite our culture's high value on individuality, we're not that good at actually cultivating and supporting the uniqueness in each and every one of us. Let's find out what you need to know about yourself so that you can live your fullest life and maintain your own values when encountering those who disagree.